MAGNIFICENT BASTARDS OF THE APOCALYPSE

In 2614, after several terrible disasters, the only habitable portion of the earth is the Feculent Zone, a wasteland of ruined cities and dry seabed.It’s the home of a great many scavengers, including Gibson Taylor, a manwith ocular implants; Flapman, who always covers his head with a bag that has a face drawn on it; and Super Patriot Boy, who wears a kilt and a tricorn hat. It’s also home to all manner of predatory horrors, including gigantic, radioactive Kaiju monsters, huge sandworms, and gangs of violent Perpetubabies (“genetically engineered thugs with adorable and deadly baby bodies”), among others. Flapman finds himself the target of the Bolshevik, a notorious mercenary and repo woman who, for some reason, is after Flapman’s hammer, “Ol’ Smashy.” The most dangerous enemies, however, are those who wield real power. Gibson, for example, runs afoul of the governing Overloards as he attempts to use the Chronoballer, the world’s only remaining time machine, to escape the FZ. The Overloards order him to help an unfriendly artificial intelligence called the Biggens in its quest to find the legendary Cudgel of Malthior, an object that can reputedly seal interdimensional rifts caused by previous time-travel expeditions. In fact, the Cudgel could finally put an end to the troubles that have made Earth such a mess in the first place. To complete their quest, Gibson and his friends—who barely function as a unit in the best of times—must team up with unsavory characters who would ordinarily kill them on sight. Can they manage to find the Cudgel and save the planet?

Torgo’s prose is precise and often funny as it contrasts post-apocalyptic depravity with the quotidian details of life in the 27th century: “The surface was bustling with activity on this lovely, low ambient-toxicity day, and though theysaw a number of organisms that they would normally murder, they respected the Scavengeday truce as they traversed the crumbling asphalt of this wretched place.” The sheer amount of imagination in this work will be enough to draw most readers in, as its mythos is rich in pastiche, allusion, absurdity, and wonder. Indeed, the fine worldbuilding helps to balance out the weakness of the characters, who are, sadly, less intriguing that their outfits would indicate. There are many big personalities, but they all tend to be big in a similar way, and most interactions devolve into fits of profanity, violence, or both. The story also takes its time getting going, in part because Torgo pursues frequent digressions that flesh out the fictional universe but don’t further the plot. The book’s satirical tone, too, loses some of its appeal after more than 300 pages. There’s a lot to enjoy here, though, and some readers are sure to love every minute of it. Even those who might wish for a tighter, more character-driven story will look forward to the author’s future offerings.

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